January 21, 2010

My parents bought a huge house with a lot of land and decided to sell out all the land from underneath other houses that were somehow tenants on it.  Everybody hated us, but we were stinking rich.  I was convinced you had to have shoes on when you signed a contract.

I went to a high school with Kevin, where Amy Poehler was shooting a variety show.  Somehow I went through a mirror into another dimension, and there were a lot of people there that I knew.  I discovered that if I bumped into them, their molecules would break down and I could absorb them.  Nobody liked that, so they all left, including people who were in the process of breaking down.  After we got out of the mirror, Kevin wanted me to eat in the gymnasium with him.  I told him no, we spent every waking moment together, please let me eat with my friends.  He said no, I have something important to tell you, but I still didn’t want to eat in the gym.

At some point we were on a yacht.  I think it was because we were so rich from screwing people over.

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